I am unable to sleep. I welcome sleep, I invite it in, I almost beg for it but it does not come. Why does it elude me? It is only when I sleep that I find rest for my soul. My soul is thirsting for something, it tortures me day and night. I try to calm it. I give it offerings but it does not take them. I try to console it but it is not consolation that it asks for. It is restless, always seeking. It keeps asking me for what it wants and it does not budge, it struts in defiance whenever I try to appease it. I have become afraid of it, I cower in its presence. It works with my heart against me. They both keep me in bondage. I want to break free or do I? I look at my chains in contemplation, with a feeling of resignation within me. I am not fighting anymore. I am tired. I am quiet. I am still.

 

-RosieD